From leaving behind impeccable opportunities in life to holding myself from making even the tiniest decisions, self-doubt took a toll on me in such a way that it almost touched every aspect of my life. With self doubt came a destructive change that ate me up every time I got this doubt catch up to me. Thus, slowly and gradually, I started getting into this dark hole, what my friend called a “Shell”.
That Shell became my safe place, my escape from every situation I wanted to ignore and I preferred staying there…. Until I finally realized that, this had to STOP.
I pushed myself time and again to not fall into this trap because I knew I wasn’t weak. I decided to not opt for something simply because it sounded easy. So, I pulled myself out of it, and here I am, bold and confident, ready for whatever life throws at me! It wasn’t easy but definitely not impossible too.
There were also times when I wanted to come back to the Shell, but everytime, I challenged it back and promised myself to not look back again.
This transformation journey had quite many things involved. Here are a few ways that helped me overcome self-doubt and I hope, it helps you too:
Learn to say STOP
Disrupt any such thought pattern that gives rise to inner doubts. Don’t let it take control over you or affect you in any way. Learn to say NO and say it repeatedly until the thought completely washes away from your mind.
Consciously, indulge in a conversation with the doubtful part of yourself and bring it back to your real self. No matter what, don’t let it grow from a whisper to a stream of discouraging words!
Have a look at the past
Our past is a mirror that often shows us the real reflection that we ought to otherwise avoid. Use this knowledge from your past to recall the times when you chose action over self-doubt and came out victorious.
Self-doubts are usually just some monsters in your head that your mind may use to keep you from making changes and to keep you within the comfort zone. Seek the help of your past to overcome it.
Get a boost of optimism
A book, podcast or an audiobook can help you from your low self-esteem and self-doubt moments to the emergence of an entirely contrasting personality.
A 20-minute session is just fine to shift your self-doubts into optimism. So, when your own thoughts are not helping you, let someone else’s motivation and constructive optimism flow over to you.
Remember that a setback is temporary
It’s a human nature to perceive things negatively during a failed attempt. This setback may even feel like your new normal, ultimately dragging you into the place where no action would feel like a fair and better choice.
But rather than falling into this trap, you need to:
Firstly, remember that nobody becomes a failure just because he or she failed. Setbacks are a part of taking chances. Sometimes things go well and sometimes they don’t. So, don’t make failure such a big thing that it disrupts your inner harmony.
Instead, take advantage of the failure and learn from the mistake and move forward once again in a smarter way.
Don’t get stuck in the comparison trap
If you want to compare, do it with yourself. If you get influenced by the highlight reels of what people share on social media or compare yourself with their successes, you won’t ever be satisfied.
Utilize this time in analyzing yourself and seeing how far you have come and become a better human being in the process.
Only when you’re positively influenced by something, that it brings in a good change, otherwise it only makes space for more self-doubt and negative influences.
Sharpen your skills
Practice. Practice. Practice.
This will bring in more self-confidence with all the learning and practice. The more knowledge you have, the more confident you will be.
Always be open to learning new things all the time and be optimistic. This helps to shift your focus on new things rather than beating yourself about something that doesn’t even matter much.
When in doubt, take conscious steps to move beyond the trap and use it for your good!